I’m Not on Good Terms

BY JACQUELINE COLLIER, 2024


I’m not on good terms with my body
My hips hold the weight of the world
They wade through emotion—am I sinking or floating?
And there flows still the pain that I’ve felt

The ache in my spine is familiar
The vertebrae, a pile of stones
Dragging me down—if I don’t swim, I drown
Trapped inside this cage of old bones

My doctor won’t give me a reason
She says there’s too many unknowns
So I’m sent off for blood tests, surrounded by cutlers
And answers keep being postponed

It feels like I’m facing a mountain
And all my discomfort just grows
And, “You can do it!” they’re all shouting
But they don’t see that I’m on a downswing
And here, in the valley, I froze

I’m begging you, doctor, please listen
I’m here at your mercy, exposed
So please try to tell me what this is
Don’t let me stay undiagnosed


Post published 01/08/26

Response

  1. ln3942 Avatar

    Beautifully written, Jacqueline. It resonates deeply. Lisa x

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